The Problem with “Monetizing”

I hear this word “monetize” a lot in social media. It’s usually close to the word “Twitter,” as in, “Twitter is looking for ways to monetize.” Pretty much every Web 2.0 bauble — from Facebook to Tumblr — is looking for ways to monetize.

I have problems with this word. For starters, who isn’t trying to monetize? Hell, I’m trying to monetize. Twitter looking for ways to monetize is like McDonald’s trying to monetize. The difference is McDonald’s wasn’t dumb enough to give their hamburgers away for free in the first place.

And that’s the crux of my beef — the meat of my argument, if you will. Shouldn’t “How will we make money?” be the first question you ask when you start a company, not an afterthought? ”Monetizing” is just code for “we didn’t plan ahead,” in my book.

Caesar didn’t look out over Rome’s vast republic and say, “Gee, we should do an IPO or something.” Napoleon didn’t think about revenues after conquering all of Europe. And just imagine the conversation if Columbus didn’t have a revenue plan when he went Queen Elizabeth:

Chris: Good news, Your Majesty. We’ve reached the New World and it’s awesome. Corn, cotton, gold — the whole enchilada.

Queen: That’s great, Chris. We should monetize. Any ideas?

Chris: Hmmm… Well, we could weave cotton into t-shirts, distribute them to the natives, then sell advertising space on the shirts.

Queen: Brilliant! Let me run it by our investors and see if they’ll finance a cotton gin.

Chris: The cotton gin hasn’t been invented yet, my lady.

Queen: Rats! Somebody call Scoble. Maybe he’ll have answers.

Imperialism works because there’s no “we’ll figure out the money later.” You don’t monetize your project. The money is the project.

I love what Wikipedia says about “monetization.” The Wik calls it “a buzzword for adapting non-revenue-generating assets to generate revenue.” Translation: “We’ll never convince you to pay for this, so how do we get someone else to pay for it?”

Plenty of people have figured out how to monetize. Chris Brogan and Joseph Jaffe both monetized this week, along with other prominent bloggers. While their method of monetization sparked quite a kerfuffle, you gotta give ‘em credit for cashing in on their success.

Kmart apparently has money to spend. Twitter needs money. And for a small fee, I could tell them how to structure a partnership.

What? I told you I was trying to monetize.

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